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The Adventures of SuperEllen Volume I, Issue 11
| She was standing in a rather large puddle. Something was spraying from above her. Something blue, it looked like windshield washer fluid. It couldn't be...or could it? |  "I thought we got rid of that owl? & when did he get a windshield?" |  "beep, beep, beep, beep" |
| When Ellen looked up, to scold the owl, she could not believe her eyes! | The Millennium Falcon was parking in the rafters! | |
  "Wow, this feels different!" |  Once on board, Ellen was greeted by 3 Jedi. |  "No, MY Schwartz is bigger than YOUR Schwartz!" |
| She tried to signal that they were in a tow away zone, but no one seemed to notice. Instead, Ellen was getting "beamed up" and I don't mean Jim. | She knew them all but still had an uneasy feeling. Maybe it was the ride up there or maybe it was the baby, or maybe it was just the bean burrito she had for lunch. | Ellen feared she was in trouble for misusing a light saber with Jedi #3. Misuse of a light saber is a serious crime and carries a sentence worse than being frozen in carbonite. |
  "What are you talking about? You never said that!" |   "Don't listen to him, he's delerious. The altitude gets him every time" |  "Is that the phone?" |
| Jedi #2 told Ellen to remember what he told her the last time he saw her... "The answer you seek is inside you and I saw a fuzzy coconut" | Jedi #1 told Ellen that she, and many others, were being taken to the planet Remulaude, where their questions would be answered in the order they were received. | Ellen wanted to see who else was on board so she started exploring the ship. Both Clintons were there and were excited to see Ellen. (I guess she has to do everything he does) |
 "Don't worry...I'll get it." |  "Get up offa that thing!" |  |
| Barack was there too. He must have been the first one picked up, because he had time to paint a mural of the Oval Office. | What happenned next was music to Ellen's ears...litterally! One of her favorite droids was gettin' down! | So she did what came naturally... SHE DANCED!!! |
 "There is a noise ordinance on this ship" |  "I told you this was the wrong ship!" |  "Have you fixed my signal yet?" |
| The music & dancing must have been too loud, because Storm Troopers showed up. Ellen gave them each a quarter (50cent) and they let her go. | When she found out they were really there to deal with some pirates that had snuck on board, Ellen asked for her 50cent back and moved on. | Knowing that he would not let it go, Ellen changed the subject and asked Batman if HE was her baby's daddy. You should have seen that bat fly! |
 "That was utterly horrendous... I have no choice but to kill you all." |   "You call those buns?...I've gotten bigger out of a Pillsbury can!" |   "I'm definitely going to win the swimsuit competition." |
| Ellen next found herself in the middle of a very strange, Princess Leia Pagaent. She would have competed herself except that... | Why didn't Ellen compete? a) Her best buns were at the cleaners. b) Warner Bros. staff are not eligible. c) She lent her gold bikini to B. Willis. | The correct answer is: b) Warner Bros. staff are not eligible. (Mr. Willis has his own gold bikini) |
 "I can lance it if you want." |  "Have you seen the pudding pops?" |  "I ate them...it was getting hot in here!" |
| Next, Ellen found herself in the ship's Doctor's office. He claimed to be an OBGYN, but his only tool was a light saber...talk about misuse. | Ellen heard loud snorting and slurping coming from the next room. She had found the galley (kitchen) which was good because she was hungry. | Before the pudding pop problem could get out of control, the Captain announced that they would be landing. That meant answers at last! |
  "Light sabers should be held in an upright position, over your head, NOT beside your face..." |  "I've got to find that flying rat... cut me out of the next one..." |   "You don't know who the daddy is?" "That's hot." "No...that's majuh." |
| Ellen tried to ask the flight attendants where to go for her answer, but they were too busy demonstrating the correct way to swing a light saber. | Then she saw one of the pilots and asked him for directions, but he was preoccupied with some kind of vermin. Maybe he's an exterminator. | Some of the other passengers overheard Ellen's situation and suggested that she go to see Pizza the Hutt, he might be able to help her. |
 "I used my light saber to power my car...I got like 90 miles to the gallon" |  "Watch out for the snakes!... they were on the plane!" | Determined to not get discouraged, Ellen continued to search out her answer (while watching for the snakes from the plane) Although she had already seen many odd things this day, nothing could have prepared her for what she saw next... |
| The Hutt told Ellen that her answer was near and gave her a pizza. She also learned what the punishment for light saber misuse was...poor pretty lady. | Ellen came across some freindly fuzzy coconut people. Maybe Jedi #2 wasn't delerious, but the coconut people were a little incoherent. | It was someone she knew doing something very unexpected... |
 "It should be hatching any day now." |  "Look...I am the father" |  "No, I'm the father...baby, cause I made you horny." |
| Tina from Hysteeria Lane!!! Before Ellen could even ask any of the obvious questions, she heard what she thought might be her answer... | It seemed promising at first, but as she got closer, it sounded like someone was talking into a fan... they were. It was "Garth Vader" | What was this, a Wayne's World reunion? Come on! She Marishka'd her way out of there feeling defeated and tired. |
 |  "Tell Batman I've got it now!" |  |
| With no energy left to walk back, Ellen took a cab to the Millennium Falcon so she could head home.There was a sign up ahead that she hadn't noticed before. | Only the first letter was visible...the letter E. It didn't make sense but it gave Ellen an idea. As they neared the sign, Ellen was able to read the whole thing...It said Emergency. | It was at this moment that our heroine realized that she wasn't in a space taxi, and she wasn't on the planet Remulaude! It took a moment, but then it all came back... |
| The last thing she remembered was... She was on her way back from her baby shower... (THAT'S RIGHT, I'M PREGNANT!) and her water broke... (THAT'S RIGHT, I'M IN LABOR!) Now, she was in an ambulance, on her way to the hospital... |  "MOMMA!!!!" | |
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